East Cobb Middle School Students Experience Real Connection
A California program helps seventh-grade students break down barriers with peers to form more positive relationships.
The dialogue, hugging and smiles were genuine.
For the fourth year in a row, the East Cobb Middle School Foundation raised approximately $20,000 to bring the California-based Challenge Day to seventh-grade students at the school.
The money spent on the program – which has been featured often on "The Oprah Winfrey Show" – aims to help East Cobb Middle School students combat the teasing, alienation and possible violence some of them may experience at school.
Judging by the candor and courage of some of the 100 students that expressed themselves during a Challenge Day session on Wednesday, students planned to radically change the world around them. Here's a sampling of the students' pledges they voluntarily made standing in front of their classmates:
-- "I used to see people get bullied and used to laugh at stuff like that. But the next time, I want to stop something happening like that," a girl said.
-- "I see people make fun of people for what they wear at school, but you have to have a life and be who you are," a boy said.
-- "I want to thank all the people who have been my friends and tell all the people who want to be a friend (I'm here) … because who wants to be lonely in this world," a girl said.
-- "I want to treat people like they matter because I see people walking down the hall looking mad and I want to tell them that life matters," a boy said.
-- "I have a friend that's sort of handicapped. I mean, she can't walk right. I'm just asking you to look at peoples' heart and not what's on the outside," a girl said.
According to information provided by the foundation, the school has more than 1,320 students in sixth, seventh and eighth grades. Its enrollment is ethnically, economically and racially diverse. Forty-eight percent of its students are black, 27 percent are white, 18 percent are Hispanic, four percent are Asian and three percent are multicultural. Fifty-eight percent are economically disadvantaged, 10 percent have disabilities and another 10 percent have limited English proficiency.
Throughout the more than seven-hour program – which is delivered to 400 students and 100 adult volunteers over a four-day span – students go through a series of games, activities and "trust-building exercises." These activities help the students to dismantle "walls of separation" and learn new ways to be empathetic and respectful. Two trained adult Challenge Day leaders, Sean Flikke and Katie Salvage, flew from California to guide the students through the program.
"What I got out of this was I saw all these people have the courage to walk across the line and share their pain," student Elinor Hudson, 12, said after Wednesday's program. "It opened my eyes and that no matter how I feel someone can feel that too."
Student Khavarian "Q" Fulton said he planned to make immediate changes in his life after experiencing Challenge Day.
"When I was younger, I used to get bullied on the bus and I'd never tell my mom so I started being mean to other people," said Fulton, 13. "After today, I'll tell my mom how I feel and I wrote a letter to my mom to tell her how I feel. Starting today, I'm going to start treating people how they'd like to be treated and not get into fights anymore."
East Cobb Middle Challenge Day Co-Chair Starlet Riviere has been involved in helping the program come to the school for the past four years. The Cobb County public school is the only one in the metro Atlanta area to have the program, which started in 1987. She said Challenge Day "changes kids' lives and in some instances it saved a life."
Riviere remembered seeing the benefit of the program the first year it came to East Cobb Middle through the transformation of a troubled student.
"We had girl that as an adult I steered clear of because she just had this 'Don't mess with me attitude,' " Riviere said. "During the day, it was like you could see her exhale for the first time. Her shoulders softened and all of a sudden she just breathed. She was a different person."
Despite many of the students knowing what the program entailed from siblings or other classmates that went through it in the past, seventh-grade language arts teacher Drew Trowers said the program continues to impact East Cobb Middle students.
"It never gets old, it never gets clichéd," said Trowers, who's in his 10th year at the school. "It's pretty genuine. No one forces anything, it's all impelled. They see others sharing something and how it helped them, and the next thing you know you've got a whole room full of sharing."
Sharon Starr was one of the 25 adult volunteers at Wednesday's program.
"An incredible day," she said. "I came from South Carolina to be here for this. Every school needs this program. It's just a tremendously touching program which touched my heart deeply. What's great about it is what it can do against bullying. I (learned) about it on 'Oprah' four years ago and waited to attend a session when it got close enough to my state."
Todd Hudson
4:53 pm on Thursday, January 6, 2011
This is a wonderful program. My daughter was very impressed with it.
Beth Day
7:17 am on Friday, January 7, 2011
Thanks for sharing this with your readers, Ethan. If all kids had the gift of Challenge Day, the world would be a better place.
Ethan Fowler
1:35 pm on Friday, January 7, 2011
I appreciate Todd and Beth's comments. Challenge Day was probably one of the most impressive programs I've seen at helping students combat bullying, negativity, loneliness and low self-esteem. These children made very real pledges to change their lives and I believe they will not only help their school and peers become more loving and supportive, but also extend that to their community and families.
I, too, hope this program will be added to other schools in the area, state and nation. From what I witnessed, it was money very well spent.
Sash
12:39 am on Monday, January 10, 2011
I participated in this program on Friday, the last day it was at East Cobb and the experience was life changing for many of the students who responded to a safe platform to just be real and themselves without judgment, as well as myself. It was an exhale moment that brought relief to the students in the group that I lead. Empathy and community were present on various levels in that gymnasium and I pray that those babies remain inspired to love, share and accept one another in spite of the differences and challenges that exist. We all crossed the line together on one or more matter which means we're all in this together! The concept of empowerment vs. victimization is phenomenal!
Michael Jacobs
9:20 am on Monday, January 10, 2011
My 13-year-old son could go all year without saying a word about school, but when I drove him to East Cobb Middle the day after he went through Challenge Day, he turned to me and said Patch really should do a story on Challenge Day because it was impressive. (Wendy and Ethan were already on top of it, of course.) "Impressive" is incredibly high praise from that boy.